French pharmacopeia

So I'm sick now with a nasty cold, and let me tell you, French pharmacies are a racket. First off, you can't buy medicine of any kind at the supermarket or any other store for that matter. No advil. No aspirin. Nothing. You MUST go to a pharmacy. And they are quite pricey. So I went in this morning looking like hell and coughing up a storm even before anyone had come to assist me. I described my symptoms-- sore throat, cough, congestion. The woman tried to sell me FIVE DIFFERENT PRODUCTS. I went all, aw naw she di'n't, and asked, "don't you have any multi-symptom medication?" I was informed that no product like that exists. So I went with the cough stuff and the nasal stuff and got some gross-ass pastilles for my throat (later much ameliorated npby Ricola, which they did not sell at the pharmacy, but ironically, in a Tabac). Now here's the fun part! I looked up the active ingredient in the cough syrup (as a good doctor's daughter I always google the shit out of whatever medicine I'm taking). It's something called Chlohydrate d'ethylmorphine. Now let's just look at that last word together. Isn't that interesting? Ethyl as in alcohol. Morphine as in morphine. Wikipedia kindly informs me that, "Ethylmorphine was invented in Germany at Merck in 1884 and was used as a weaker alternative to heroin for all indications". Oh wow, that makes me feel really comfortable about taking this medication. Also, ALL indications? Are you certain of that, Wikipedia? I mean, can I take this medication if I want to "feel just like Jesus' son"? Can I also take in under the bridge at night? What if I'm feeling like a needle in the hay?
Okay, I digress, it did help with the cough. It's not totally gone, but I feel better. That shit makes me feel weird though, right after I take it. I mean, all narcotic cough syrups do. Not that I've taken ALL NARCOTIC COUGH SYRUPS, just that I've taken one before in the states when I've been really sick. And it just makes you feel loopy and kind of dissociated. In an unpleasant way. Anyway, it's looking like it's my bedtime. Stay tuned for for adventures.